Nonfiction Gender Narrative

My older sister has two children: one daughter, Mackenzie, age 3, and one son, Xander, age 1. In watching them learn and perform gendered behavior, I have gained insight into how gender develops.

While I am unable to identify any situation in which Mackenzie was specifically taught to be feminine, it is easy for me to recognize how much of a girly-girl she is already. Her mother, my sister, works full time. In fact, her father, my brother-in-law, actually cares for the children during the work day part of each week. She has not been raised in an environment in which one would expect her to develop what is widely considered feminine behavior and tendencies. However, she won’t leave the house without both one of her many purses and one of her many baby dolls. She loves to pretend to put on make-up, but her mother does not even wear make-up. She loves princesses, and dress up, and shopping. Her mother has never instructed her that these are the things that little girls enjoy. In fact, on more than one occasion both of Mackenzie’s parents have encouraged her to participate in activities traditionally considered masculine, like cars, tools, and sports. But while she has grown up in an open-minded home with a strong female role model and a reversal of gender roles at times, she has also grown up surrounded by women. Not women that fit the stereotype, or women that exhibit excessive femininity, but strong women, educated and hard-working, but still women: myself, my mother, my two younger sisters, my older sister. She watches us carry purses, and she mimics the behavior. She watches my sisters and I apply make-up, and she mimics the behavior. She pays close attention and, through observation, has learned her gender, learned how to be a female.

Xander loves balls of all sizes, cars, and playing in the dirt. He has strong male role models in his father and in my brother. But, the feminine presence in his life is obvious. Not only is he impacted by my sisters, my mother, and me, but is also constantly watching and learning from his big sister, Mackenzie. He also loves baby dolls. He will, on occasion, attempt to borrow Mackenzie’s purse. He has observed feminine behavior and is not yet old enough the distinguish himself as male and masculine.